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His next series features a mental home who release patients back
onto the streets with
hands free mobile phones glued to their head, so that people
think that they're talking to someone else other than God.
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Mark's worst experience is when he was booked into a hotel where
one conference room was hosting 'The Annual Politician CCTV Laughalong',
the other
'A businessman's guide to cheap shoe production'. Not knowing which to
tell off
first, he stood between the two and cried.
Then, to make matters even worse, the lift bell rang and Michael Moore stepped
out wearing his 'swimming fronts' (what he calls his converted pair
of y-fronts) on
the way to the pool.
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Skinny Mark always wears a fake belly, so that it can be replaced
by hidden cameras and it will still look the same.
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Mark is currently working on a film translation of 'No Logo' by Naomi Klein.
All the budget's going on an explosion in a shoe factory
in which the shoes all fly out into the sky and kick god (Brian Blessed)
in the face.
The Manic Street Preachers are to perform the theme song,
'Peanuts
for you, little Girl'. Basist Nicky Wire loves the book and reads it to his
daughter every night before bedtime. "It could be the new Harry Potter",
he enthused. "Where does Naomi get her amazing ideas?"
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The next series of 'The Mark Thomas Product' is going to be filmed
entirely on CCTV.
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Another nasty discovery of Mark's is that the American Adventure theme
park are
raising people on the venue from babies to actually believe they are
Cowboys and Indians, and
thus to them they aren't stunts they do for the public's entertainment,
they're real time life-or-death dramas.
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Going to Tescos in the middle of the night to avoid his fans, Mark was followed by
all 5 store detectives as he was the only person there.
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So that he can't be bugged, Mark never uses a telephone. Instead, he
uses two cans attached to each end of a string to communicate
with friends.
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Mark is the proud winner of NME.com's Golden Popup for his report
on Esso's plans to sell more petrol by replacing the motorway with
treadmills so that you have to travel twice as
far to get somewhere. He protested about this by dressing as a road
and jumping out in front of the chairman's car, inviting him to run
him down. For this, he spent three months in hospital.
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